I wanted to take a few minutes to talk about an issue that is very dear to my heart. Video games.
Now if you follow any of my social media sites, you will know that I love posting, talking, and taking pictures about food. The one word I ALWAYS use whenever I post a picture of food, or a recipe, is MODERATION. I am one of those people that truly believe in all things in moderation. Having too much of any good thing is a bad thing. And I believe that this applies to video games (and most everything)as well. Hell, at my age, even reading should be done in moderation.
I am not old, by any means, but I do have a family to take care of. I cook, I clean, I fold laundry, I organize baby toys, and my own "toys" and hobby equipment. I make sure the calendar is up to date, and balance the budget, and make sure we take time for our family. I also eat healthy, and exercise, and watch my friend's children, in order to help her lead a healthy, active lifestyle.
But, I also, love playing video games. And video games can be addictive. there are plenty of research studies that prove that. I've seen and heard of men and women who fly into rages at the loss of a game. There is a whole culture of gamers out there that thrive on the newest, the greatest, the classics, and the oldest games out there. Their love of games knows no bounds. And that is wonderful. our culture accepts these people into their fold with no problem, because our culture has room for another "sub-genre" of people in it. Yes, are these kids bullied, and yes, are these adults who love all things video game, comic book, graphic novel, manga made to feel belittled and ostracized sometimes? yes. But that is because, unfortunately, our culture also has room for arrogant, belittling, mean, bullies who were never taught kindness, love, or respect of another human being.
I am here to say that this should not be the case. Everyone has seen the article and read the studies about how video games are evil and warp the minds of the young and eat up valuable money and time, blah blah, blah.
I have not conducted my own personal study of this, so if that's what you are looking for, this isn't the place for you.
I think that yes, video games CAN influence children, if they do not have other, positive influences in their life. I believe that our children should be slightly censored against video games. And I do believe that video games, if played incorrectly, can have a negative impact of a person's social life and bank account.
Let's get into it.
Do I think that children can be influenced by video games? yes. 100%. IF there isn't a good and well balanced support system in place to help nurture that child. If you were to lock a five year old into a room and let him play Grand Theft Auto (GTA) for instance, yes, he would probably start to mimic the things that he sees in this game. Because that's what a five year old will do! they are little human shaped sponges, waiting to suck up any and all information there is out there! And if you too him into a room where everything was set up, like in the video game, he would most likely go on kicking, punching, shooting, and destroying everything he sees. But, if this child's guardian then came into the room and told him to stop. He would. Why? Because children seek guidance. That is why he repeats what he sees in the game. he uses it as a learning tool. Which, it is not intended to be. Should a guardian tell him that stealing from people and kicking, punching, and causing chaos is wrong, this would simply start to shape his morals into what they will be when he is an adult. This is called teaching.
By no means do I think that you should expose your child to violent games and such just to teach them right from wrong. What I do think, is that parents need to realize that when a child sees something that they deem bad, they need to not freak out and call a stop to it, but instead, use it as a teaching moment.
That being said, I do think that parents need to be aware of what children are watching nowadays. Back when I was a child, most rated M games or rated R movies were boring. They were dark, and sometimes scary, and full of bad words that, because I knew they were bad, made me blush and shy away from them. Now, games like Saints Row and GTA are brightly colored and full of fun music, laughing, running around, and child like things such as teddy bears, bright "Hotwheels" type cars, and popular music. This draws children in, instead of making them shy away. And if you are actively playing the game, and enjoying shooting an old woman or humping a car until it breaks, then your child will believe that these things are socially acceptable and appropriate. If, while you are playing your game, you explain that it is make believe, and that the things in the game are inappropriate, your child will probably ask you why you are playing it and about 1,000 questions about the game and the actions in the game. Have fun explaining yourself.
There are plenty of fantasy games out in the world that aren't as extreme as these two games I have previously mentioned, and obviously those are extreme cases. And by no means am I saying that these games are evil! if you like them, then play them! They are a great source of entertainment. They are not evil at all, they just might not be the most productive games to play around a child.
I think that out of all this though, the biggest obstacle that gamers face is time. Getting sucked into a game is the easiest thing in the world. The plot draws us in, the mystery, the suspense, the terror, the feeling of triumph, all these things envelop us and pull us into a sweet embrace, lulling us to play the game for hours and hours. If you have the time and the inclination for that, they go for it. But for most people in the world, balancing video games and everything else in our lives is the most difficult challenge. there is so much to do in a day, and if video games are controlling 40% of your day, then you are stopped from being productive (when you need to be).
I've had those days when I have had a list as long as my arm of stuff to get done, and instead I am in front of the TV, a litre of water between my legs and a controller in my hands. But I've also had those days where i have nothing else i need to do, and I can devote a couple hours to playing. And that, is honestly one of the best feelings. i get to sit back and enjoy the game, with no twinges of guilt and no consequences. I, obviously, have a little one to take care of, so I take frequent breaks and let her play in the load screens, and even let her play her own game if she's so inclined. She's two, so she becomes bored quite quickly and moves onto something else, so I can play my game for another half hour and take a break again. Or, my husband and I will take turns watching her while the other one plays.
This is the most important example we need to set for our children. Content is parent regulated. If you think that your child is old enough to understand that stealing cars and killing people is bad, then that is your call 100%, but the time you devote to games should always be done in moderation. I devote one hour of my day to playing video games, sometimes less, sometimes none. I have a lot on my plate, and it brings me satisfaction to know that I have allocated my time properly and efficiently.
If your child sees you doing ANYTHING for an extended period of time, then they will thing that this is how time is allotted. If you've ever been playing a game, but dinner is ready, and you call out "Five More Minutes", expect that the next time our child is playing, they will ask for more time. if you are reading, and you stay up all night reading this novel because you HAVE to finish it, expect that when your child is reading or playing, and you tell them lights out, they will be reluctant. Children imitate life. Especially the lives of their guardians. Everything in moderation. Reading exercise, video games, movies, TV shows, everything. If you truly want your child to live a healthy and balanced lifestyle, you need to emulate that for them. There is of course room for video games, TV shows, and movies in a healthy lifestyle. just because it's a healthy lifestyle doesn't mean you need to cut out all forms of entertainment. Facebook, Instagram and Twitter all drag us in once in a while. But setting a timer will allow you allocate your time wisely instead of spending all Saturday binge watching Orange is the New Black or the last season of Supernatural.
Trust me, I have been there. But priorities and lifestyles change when you become a parent. Your life, immediately becomes an example for this child, whether you want it to or not. "Do as I say, not as I do," does not fly. If anything, it teaches your children to be hypocritical and mischievous, instead of honest and adventurous.
Obviously, this is only my opinion. I don't have all the figures and numbers to back myself up, but I'm sure the Internet is full of educational material about video games affecting children. Go explore the depths of the Internet to either smash my opinion into the ground, or just go look for interesting games to play on your smart phones.
Just makes sure that you set a timer.
Warm wishes,
